Why A Narcissist Often Comes Back Just When You’re Feeling Better
There’s this one moment that feels almost surreal. You wake up in the morning and you realize: something has changed.
Your breathing is calmer. Your vision is clear. Your heart doesn’t feel quite as heavy as it did a few weeks or months ago.
Perhaps you’ll laugh again – tentatively at first, then more genuinely. And perhaps you’re just beginning to rediscover yourself, step by step.
And that’s exactly when it happens.
A message on your screen. A name you thought had long since disappeared from your life. Perhaps a seemingly harmless encounter that feels disturbingly planned. And suddenly, the very person who left you feeling empty inside back then is standing before you again. Polite. Charming. Frighteningly familiar.
And you ask yourself: Why now? Why exactly at the moment when I’m finally feeling better?
If you’ve experienced something similar, know this: you’re not alone. And no, it’s not just your imagination.
There are clear reasons why people with narcissistic traits often reappear just when you begin to grow and flourish internally.
This text is for you if you want to understand what lies behind this recurring pattern and why your own strength plays a much more crucial role than you might realize.
The moment you arrive back at yourself.
Healing is not a noisy process. It is quiet. Often you only realize later how far you have come.
Perhaps you have learned to be alone again without that old, oppressive fear overwhelming you. Perhaps you have begun to set boundaries – first within yourself, then also in the world around you. People around you notice it and say things like:
“You’ve changed.” “You seem alive again.”
And it is precisely this change that makes the difference.
Because narcissistic dynamics thrive on imbalance. As long as you doubted, hoped, and adapted, you were emotionally accessible. You gave, explained, and endured. And perhaps you even believed that the failure lay with you.
But now something is shifting: You no longer need external validation to feel your worth. You no longer seek answers from him.
And that’s exactly what he senses.
Why your inner strength throws him off balance
People with narcissistic tendencies rarely derive their self-worth from within themselves. They need external validation. They need people who admire them, idealize them, or are emotionally attached to them. Others serve as a mirror in which they can feel grand, important, and superior.
As long as you were suffering, you were available.
