Your loneliness may be trying to convince you that crawling back on your toxic ex is the right thing to do, but don’t listen to them. Never listen to the lies your loneliness tries to feed you.
Everyone gets lonely. Read these words again: Everyone is lonely.
I know sometimes you feel like you are the only person with a broken heart, or that you are the only one who hasn’t found love. I know sometimes you just want to give up or fall into the familiar because you’re scared of being alone.
But you should never let loneliness drive you back to your toxic ex.
While falling into a relationship with an ex again may seem convenient and safe, it’s actually one of the most harmful things you can do.
Here’s why you should never let your loneliness drive you back to a toxic ex
1. In essence, nothing has changed.
If you feel like you want to get back together with a toxic ex, ask yourself this question: what has really changed?
If you can’t see how the relationship could be any different, or how the two of you can create healing and a stronger, healthier bond, then you are kidding yourself. There’s no need to go back to something that didn’t work to begin with.
2. You cannot fix brokenness out of desperation.
You may think that you can fix what was broken by trying again. At its core, it’s a good thing to give people and relationships another chance.
But not if the connection was unhealthy to begin with.
You can’t let loneliness drive you back to your toxic ex. Brokenness isn’t something that can be fixed because you’re afraid, desperate, or hoping things will change. While it can be hard to accept, you are better off alone than running back to someone who hurt you.
3. You cannot let fear guide your decisions.
Maybe you are afraid of being alone. You may be afraid of not finding someone who can heal the hole in your heart that your toxic ex left behind. Here is something to remember: You are not broken permanently and there is no hole in you.
You are a complete person even if you have been hurt.
Don’t let fear drive you back to the person who broke your heart. While being alone will undoubtedly be tough, you need to believe that the right person will come to you before the time is right. You have to believe that you will not be lonely forever.
4. There are far better things and people out there.
There are better people out there. There are relationships with people who love you for who you are and don’t ask you to bend, shift, or change. You will find someone who won’t abuse or abuse you, who won’t run away at the first sign of anger.
I know you can be lonely right now, but that’s not a permanent state. You will rise from the pain, find someone who will treat you better, and move on with a smile on your face.