My twisty new thriller, The Guilty Twin, follows two ex-best friends who are plagued with guilt over the lies they’ve told and the secrets they’ve kept. In honor of it becoming available for pre-order, here is what each zodiac should stop feeling so guilty about this November if they want to make the most of the month:
Stop feeling guilty about your quiet, unproductive moments. It’s okay if you want to turn down plans and stay in instead. It’s okay if you need some time to rest and recharge instead of going out with friends or jumping headfirst into a new project. You don’t need to spend every second doing something exciting and adventurous, or productive and ambitious. You’re allowed to simply exist.
Stop feeling guilty about your successes. You deserve it, even if you’re suffering from imposter syndrome right now. Remember, when something good happens to you, you’re allowed to shout it from the rooftops. Don’t feel embarrassed because it’s not bragging to share the things that you’re excited about, the moments that make you proud. Let the world know how far you’ve come. Enjoy this moment.
Stop feeling guilty about your complaints. You’re allowed to experience negative emotions. Even though you have a ton to be thankful for and don’t want to take the good things for granted, it’s okay to say how you’re really feeling. It’s okay to be angry or upset or bitter. It’s better to be honest about what’s running through your head than to bottle everything up until you explode. No one can be happy all the time, so stop playing pretend.
Stop feeling guilty about asking for more than the bare minimum. Even though you’re a giver who feels uncomfortable when the roles are reversed, that doesn’t mean you should be the only one putting effort into your friendships and relationships. You should expect your loved ones to treat you with as much tenderness and generosity as you give them. Stop accepting less than you deserve because it’s not selfish to set expectations.
Stop feeling guilty about overlooking red flags. Even though you might feel like you should have seen the warning signs sooner, you shouldn’t treat yourself like a punching bag. You shouldn’t blame yourself when the other person was the one who treated you poorly. They are the one you should be upset with, not yourself. You can’t have all the answers, so don’t feel guilty about how long it took you to leave a certain friendship, career, or relationship.
Stop feeling guilty about cutting people out of your world. You might hope that every person who enters your orbit remains there forever — but that’s rarely the way it works. Sometimes, you’ll grow in different directions. Sometimes, you’ll end up better off apart. When that time comes, don’t feel guilty about walking away. It’s worse to string someone along or prolong a relationship that is making you both miserable. It’s much better to cut ties, even if it hurts right now.
Stop feeling guilty about saying no. Even though you have a huge heart and are dedicated to helping others, that doesn’t mean you should put their well-being ahead of your own. Sometimes, you need to watch how much you’re putting on your plate. You have to be mindful about how much you’re doing and who you’re doing it for. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you have to run whenever they call — especially if it’s going to damage your mental health in the process.
Stop feeling guilty about relaxing. You’re not meant to be working 24 hours a day. You’re not mean to exhaust yourself trying to reach your dreams. It’s important to set goals for yourself and to stick to a schedule, but don’t sacrifice your mental health in order to take another step up the career ladder. If you never rest, you’re going to burn yourself out. You’re going to end up regretting it.
Stop feeling guilty about making the decisions that are best for yourself. You’re not heartless for prioritizing yourself. You’re supposed to make choices that are best for you. You’re supposed to take your thoughts, hopes, and needs into consideration every single day. It’s brave to chase after what you want instead of automatically doing what others are pushing you to do. It’s brave to forge your own path.
Stop feeling guilty about getting emotional. You’re entitled to your feelings, even if they might feel illogical. Remember, your heart doesn’t have to make sense. You feel the way that you feel, and you’re allowed to express this to others. If your tears make them uncomfortable, that’s on them. You should be proud of yourself for being so vulnerable, of speaking your truth instead of hiding it away.
Stop feeling guilty about treating yourself. You deserve to be pampered. You deserve to feel special. You should never feel guilty about giving yourself a reward after a long, hard week — or after a lazy week. Remember, you don’t have to ‘earn’ rest or kindness from yourself. You deserve those things just for being you.
Stop feeling guilty about prioritizing yourself. You’re not selfish for showing yourself love and respect, for deciding that what you want matters, for making choices that make you proud but might upset those around you. Even though you’re a people-pleaser at heart, you can’t allow others to determine how you live your life. You need to do what makes the most sense for you. What makes you the happiest.