Is He Jealous? 10 Subtle Signs He Is Hiding His Jealousy
Is it OK if I spend the night with friends? Will my boyfriend be mad if I accept the follow request I just got from that guy I have known for years?
Is he jealous when I talk to other guys ? Is he threatened by the fact that he may lose me?
Will he get mad if I come home late this evening? Or am I just imagining things?
These are all the questions no girl should be asking herself. However, these and similar things have been running through your head lately and you simply can’t avoid them.
Your gut is telling you that your boyfriend is extremely jealous but to be frank, he has never told you anything straightforwardly so now you are not sure whether you’re exaggerating or if he is really a possessive control-freak.
No man will just show or admit that he is a jealous guy . It’s a nasty personality trait that can be very dangerous, especially for the sake of your relationship.
Lucky for you there are ways to get into the secret chambers of his mind not even he knows exist. With His Secret Obsession you’ll get yourself in a place where you never again have to wonder what he’s thinking.
Let’s face it, all guys get jealous in some situations. Nevertheless, there is a huge difference between cute jealous behavior and possessiveness .
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to think about things such as, ” He is jealous for me because he loves me too much.” Remember that jealousy is never a sign of love—it is a sign of a man’s insecurity and his attempt to control you.
If your man shows early signs of jealousy , it can destroy your relationship from the beginning because jealousy very easily turns into possessiveness and it can turn him into a monster.
So, are there any proven signs that he is a jealous boyfriend that you can discover despite the fact he’s hiding them? No one can be sure.
It all depends on how you look at it and how you interpret his behavior.
It’s possible that sometimes you get the wrong impression and accuse him, even though he is not guilty.
Truth be told, men always send mixed signals and you never know what they are actually thinking about and you’re left with no choice other than to guess what goes around in their head.
Infatuation Scripts help you read every little cue they give you and use it to your advantage.
They will never tell you directly but they will try to hide it and send subtle messages which you have to read.
Why do guys get jealous and why do guys hide their jealousy?
– They want to hide their weaknesses and low self-esteem
– Women want strong men who aren’t easily threatened
– They don’t want to show their emotions
– They don’t want to be rejected because of their jealous behavior
– They are insecure and compare themselves to your ex boyfriends
Jealousy makes us do things we wouldn’t normally do and this is especially true for guys.
When they are in a relationship, they can get extremely possessive and the reason behind it is that they are either simply a jerk or they are very insecure.
When they get emotionally attached to someone, they are afraid that they are not good enough for that person and that’s why they begin to play a game of control and jealousy.
If your guy is reasonable, the best thing you can do in this situation is to let him know that you aren’t going anywhere, that you love him and that he doesn’t have to worry.
Assure him that if you ever have a problem or some unresolved issues in your relationship, he is going to be the first person you’re going to talk to.
He will understand that you just have to talk to him nicely. Nevertheless, if he is the jealous type , he will never change.
You’re never going to have any space or time to yourself. You’re always going to be questioned when you get back home and he’s never going to trust you.
Anyway, it’s so hard to recognize the red flags that he is the jealous type because he hides it all the time. Men are very confusing creatures.
When they were kids, they punched and poked girls because they didn’t know how to express that they liked them.
The same goes for this—they’d rather get all passive-aggressive than admit that they have a problem.
They act like they don’t care about you and then they say they love you. Who can keep up with this confusing behavior?
Don’t worry, keep reading to clear all the doubts you’ve had so far and see whether he’s really jealous or if you are maybe overreacting.
Is he jealous signs
If you’re looking for a list signs he is jealous , here they are. Also, if you want to do a ” Is he jealous?” quiz , you’re in the right place—just follow the points mentioned below and if you can associate your boyfriend with more than half of them, you have more than enough proven signs he is jealous and possessive .
1. He pouts when you talk about someone
If you have a funny story from work or something happened to you and it involved another person, (for example, your coworker or your male friend ) and you talk about it to your boyfriend or husband but you speak with excitement, he won’t be glad to hear you talking about that.
Sometimes it doesn’t even matter whether it is about a guy or a girl, it’s just when it’s someone else and that is one of the first signs a guy is jealous .
He won’t tell you upfront but he will make faces and gasp (which are both clear body language signs he is jealous ) while you’re talking about that person and the situation you were in, as if you did a bad thing .
That is one of the clearest signs a guy is jealous but trying to hide it because he doesn’t want to seem too attached.
He doesn’t want to show it because he knows it’s disrespectful to you.
However, like anything, this jealousy can cross the line and become extremely dangerous.
2. He is too sweet and charming
This is not strange if he acts like this all the time but if he is not the romantic type and then all of a sudden he starts giving you enormous amounts of attention, you can guess that something is wrong.
He’s probably scared of losing you and that is why he’s calling you non-stop—to check up on you.
Maybe you started a new job or you met some new people, including new male friends , and now he feels threatened.
He won’t say it to your face because he doesn’t want to show his weakness.
He’ll try to hide it but his feelings will be stronger and they have to come out one way or another.
3. He plays hard to get
If you see that he is acting strange all of a sudden for no particular reason, that he is more distant instead of talking to you upfront after you’ve done something he probably doesn’t like, these are some of the signs he is jealous but hiding it .
If you talked to another guy and he saw you and suspected something, he will pull away from you and close himself off and he will keep you at arm’s length.
One of the reasons for that is that he wants you to chase him and ‘win’ him over, so he can reclaim his sense of self-worth by making you prove to him that he is still in first place in your life.
He wants you to prove to him that you still love him and that you don’t care for that other guy.
So, if you chase him and push him into revealing why he’s acting strange, he will probably stop because he’ll see that he is being a jealous boyfriend for no reason.
He’ll realize that the other guy doesn’t mean anything to you and that you still love him.
4. He acts tough
One of the telltale signs that he is jealous but is hiding it is when he starts acting tough even though it’s not in his nature.
His male pride starts kicking in because he feels threatened and sees that his already low self-esteem is about to get completely crushed.
He wants to fight anyone who takes a look at you (including your guy friends ) because he wants to show everyone that you’re his and no one else’s.
This can also be very dangerous and a sign of unhealthy jealousy because if he takes it too far, you can pay the price for that.
He may start forbidding you to do things just because of his insecurity or even become violent.
He won’t trust you and will constantly have the feeling that you are hiding something from him.
If his jealousy crosses this line, it may turn into abusive behavior.
Watch out for it and if this happens, try to talk to him. If you can’t reason with him, leave him immediately because it will only get worse.
5. He is weird when you go out without him
Another thing that makes your boyfriend jealous is you spending time without him.
This can be a double-edged sword because you can never be quite sure whether he is acting weird because he is jealous or because he is genuinely sad that you went out without him.
Maybe he really loves spending time with you and misses you when you’re not around, so that is why he’s been texting and calling you all the time.
However, if you see that he is acting possessively and is questioning you a lot, then he is definitely just nervous because he is sure that you will do some bad things for your relationship—for example, flirt with other guys or even cheat on him while you’re gone.
Usually, this means he is acting strange because he is scared of losing you and he can’t watch over every move you make.
He can’t control where you go or what you do and that makes him anxious and scared that you’re going to meet someone new and leave him.
6. He just shows up
We all have to have some time for ourselves or the time when we want to hang out with our friends without our boyfriend present.
I mean it’s okay, you love each other, but sometimes you just need a break and if this is something your partner has a problem with, you should see it as a warning sign of jealousy .
Well, if your boyfriend just happens to be popping up at the places where you go with your friends (especially when it comes to your guy friends and male coworkers ), wouldn’t that be a bit suspicious?
Definitely yes, because he is clearly going to those places on purpose to check up on you.
He is a jealous guy and doesn’t trust you, so he has to see with his own eyes that you aren’t doing anything bad.
This is so frustrating and you shouldn’t have to live this way, with the constant feeling that someone is keeping track of every move that you make. If he doesn’t get that he is crossing the line, leave him.
7. He will make it all about power
If something makes your boyfriend jealous , he won’t talk to you about it and instead, he will start a power war.
He is so insecure and frustrated that he is deliberately going to destroy your sense of self-worth so he can win the power game and ‘restore’ order. All of a sudden, he will pout and create a fight out of every little thing .
Nothing special has to happen but he may just forbid you to do some things, such as having social media profiles (because he imagines that you flirt with other guys there or that you’ve been using it to stalk your ex boyfriend ) or ask you to give him your phone, just so he could see who you’ve been texting .
It is not that these things really bother him—he only wants to show you who is in charge and who has the control in a relationship.
Besides, he also wants to prove to himself that he is in first place in your life and that you love him enough to do whatever he tells you to do.
Be honest—how many times has the sentence, “He isn’t jealous for me—he is jealous of me,” crossed your mind? How many times have you noticed that your partner is actually threatened by your strength and seen that he is doing everything he can to destroy it, so he could feel better about himself?
These are not men, these are boys who haven’t got a clue what life (and especially love) is.
Try to avoid these kinds of men because they are potential maniacs and control freaks who just need one trigger to go crazy and make your life miserable.
8. He wants to end things between the two of you
This doesn’t happen a lot but when it happens, you can’t recognize it as a sign of jealousy, as it’s so subtle that it disguises itself as something else. However, if you dig into the matter more deeply, you’ll see things more clearly and get what is going on.
If he wants to end the relationship all of a sudden without a reason, it must be something he is ashamed to admit.
We all know how much men value strength and avoid showing their feelings in public, especially the fact that they are as vulnerable as we all are.
Well, he is possibly jealous of another man in your life because he is insecure and feels like he doesn’t deserve you.
That’s why he’ll break it off before he falls for you even harder and before you end up hurting him.
9. He flirts with other women
Is he trying to make me jealous ? What are the signs he is trying to make me jealous ?
How many times have you asked yourself these questions, wondering whether you’re just imagining things or you’re really seeing the signs he is trying to make you jealous ? If you’re trying to get an answer to the question, ” Why is he trying to make me jealous?”, psychology can give it to you—he is doing it to rebuild his broken ego.
He is not usually like this, at least not in front of you, but lately, he is doing it more and more.
You keep noticing red flags all over his social media , you catch him texting and even see him checking out other girls.
This behavior contradicts his personality and the way he usually acts.
You have no other choice than to think that something is wrong but he keeps his mouth shut and doesn’t want to tell you anything.
Perhaps he thinks you are interested in someone else, so he tries to get back at you by flirting with other girls.
You can see while he is doing it that he is really not as interested in them as he is interested that you can see him talking to other women.
10. He sulks when you’re out
Even when the two of you go out, he may show tell tale signs of jealousy but he’ll try to hide them so his insecurity does not get too obvious.
For example, if you want to go out and he doesn’t feel like it, he will go anyway because he doesn’t want to let you go alone.
And once you go out, he’ll be in a bad mood and he’ll act like a baby.
He doesn’t want to do this, he doesn’t want to do that, he doesn’t want to go there… every little thing will bother him.
However, he’ll try to hide it because he doesn’t want to tell you directly that he only went out because he didn’t want to let you out of his sight.
The next step in ruining your night out by getting you home where it’s safe is sulking, which is a trick you shouldn’t fall for.
He is only doing this to get you home because he is worried that something or someone might be more interesting or fun than he is and he can’t take that.
Jealousy really is a bitch and it can be extremely dangerous if it crosses the line of acceptable behavior.
Even if you love that person so much, don’t tolerate being emotionally abused just because he is insecure and can’t handle it so he projects it onto you.
After all, jealousy and trust don’t go together. It’s only one or the other.
Where there is jealousy, there is no trust. Where there is no trust, there is no real relationship .
It’s okay when it happens sometimes and in small amounts and it’s even cute but if it becomes a normal thing in your relationship, then you have a problem and you have to fix it, either by talking or by leaving.